Anatomy of a Twitter Dogpile

If you’ve been on twitter for more than a minute you’ve probably witnessed and cringed at your fair share of dogpiling.

However, in the rare case you haven’t, I’m going to break it down for you. Before we begin though, I feel I have to state the obvious to try and avoid my own dogpile — this is not a defense of anyone who tweets hate speech or acts abhorrently. Those people are fucked and deserve what they get. I shouldn’t have to state that, but this is on the topic of twitter where any benign tweet/comment/different opinion can be twisted and get you blocked, retweeted, subtweeted into oblivion.

Anyhow, here we go, my attempt at dissecting the twitter dogpile.

1.     Someone tweets something they shouldn’t have. We’ve all done it at some point. Or nearly done it. We’re all human. No one is perfect.  

2.     They are called out for it in a DM or a reply.

3.     They realize their idiotic mistake, apologize and delete the tweet.

4.     No one else comments on it because it’s already been called out by one or two people and what would be the point in stating the same opinion that something was bad over and over and over again? So, everyone then says “you’ve apologized now and that’s okay. We all make stupid mistakes sometimes and you’ve learned your lesson hopefully.”

5.     It’s forgotten within a few hours.

6.     The End.

That’s how it should go down. But it doesn’t. Why? Let’s try and break it down one more time.

1.     Someone (usually someone relevant/popular/successful/influential. Have you ever seen someone with less than 100 followers get dogpiled? No, I didn’t think so.) tweets something they shouldn’t have.

2.     A few people correctly call the original tweeter on their bullshit in DMs or singular replies.

3.     The original tweeter recognizes they’ve fucked up, deletes the tweet and apologizes publicly for it.

4.     Some frustrated people, with grudges over perceived slights, petty jealousies, or with too much time on their hands rub those same damn hands gleefully together while murmuring at the glowing screen in front of them, “Oh, you done fucked up now. I got you now. This is my chance to show everyone how righteous I am and kick you when you’re down while I’m at it. Whilst also being safe within the jeering crowd.”

5.     Everyone virtual signals by tweeting and retweeting how bad they think the original tweet is. “Look at me, everyone! I need to say this is bad too! I’m a good person! Look at me everyone, I said a bad thing is a bad thing and a tweet is a form of social activism! I feel all warm and fuzzy inside my tummy now.”

6.     Onlookers not participating in the dogpile read tweets like they’re reading the dialogue to some cheesy reality tv because everyone loves drama when it isn’t directed at them. Others who happen to like the original tweeter don’t try and stick up for that person getting dogpiled because they don’t want to become a target as well. Or lose a handful of followers. Or jeopardize their contract with a small indie press so they keep their mouths firmly shut. Later, when the drama has died down they’ll come around that person again in a DM like “dude, you had trouble on line? I wasn’t on Twitter for those days so didn’t notice. I would’ve had your back though 100%…”

7.     The original tweeter goes on apologizing.

8.     The dogpile continues because, well, hell, it's never really been about correcting someone, it's about burning them down, an attempt to shame them for as long as possible. To make them suffer. Sometimes even going to dangerous extremes. And it’s never really been about the tweet, it’s always been about the people doing the dogpiling and their hunger for the limelight to be on them and how righteous they are.

9.     A week later, the juice has pretty much been squeezed out of the beef. The original tweeter is badly damaged or even ruined. People have become bored and moved on to the next dogpile. Maybe this time its someone you know or maybe it's even you.

Will this type of behavior change? No. It was happening, and still happens to celebrities and politicians all the time in the media. Look at some of the shit Madonna is currently getting. Or the harsh critique John Fetterman’s wife got recently. I suppose it’s the human nature of crowds to throw rocks.

Will everyone continue to tiptoe around on eggshells? Yes.

Andy Warhol said everyone gets their fifteen minutes of fame.

Nowadays, I think it's more like everyone gets their five days of twitter flame.